This is starting to get real, and scary. I dunno, maybe I should just become celibate. Maybe I should just become homeless. I have been projecting bigtime lately. Sure I still have my g/f. But the truth is that while I love her, there is no way we are going to be able to make a 500 mile relationship work. If I have a woman in my life, I need to be with her. As often as possible. And now I find myself in financial ruin. I am behind on my bills, my car is still a piece of crap, and I am only going to run the debt higher this week as I will have to run the a/c. You should see the meter spin when the a/c is on. You can cut diamonds with it. I still have my bronchitis. And I still drink from time to time. I saw a video of my performance at church yesterday and I look like a beached whale. I did step 3 of AA, which is turning it over to God, and I want to let Him drive for awhile, but I am also very, very, very tired. I am tired of working 60 hours a week and having no money to show for it. I am tired of worrying about shit that is out of my control. When I saw the house that my wife was moving into it made me feel worse. It was ok (mentally) for me when she was living in a shit apartment, as I was doing the same. Now...I feel even worse. Life's challenges are becoming wwwaaaaaaayyyy too much for me. I really should just give in.