i am everything that i hate...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by twilight, Nov 17, 2007.

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  1. twilight

    twilight Well-Known Member

    I am in college right now and I am in my second year of it. I hate the weekends because I know that everyone is having a good time and I am doing nothing. Obviously people can see that I am a shy person but they probably don't know how incredibly painful it is for me. I did have some friends last year and I had some good times. But I don't think I am an interesting or fun enough person to have a long-term friendship. People just get sick of me and then leave. I feel so horrible right now and I am hating myself so much. I know this sounds pathetic and whiny but I don't care. I have to say this to someone. I hate how I am interested in someone who is living with his supposedly ex-girlfriend. He tells me that there is no chance of them getting back together. This is the only person in my life right now. I have never had a relationship and there is absolutely no one I can ask for advice. I am going to feel like a complete moron if I find out he and this girl get back together and I get left alone.
  2. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Here's a suggestion. On the weekends that you find youself alone, why not volunteer at an elderly care home. The seniors there love the company ( they are usually alone on weekends too). They have no great and demanding expectations of you. They just want some genuine quality time with others. Another option is at the children's ward of your local hospital. Or try a help line. You will make many new friends in the residents, patients and the others who work or volunteer there. The feeling you get from volunteering will boost your self esteem tremendously and you have so much to offer. Before you know it, you won't remember shy old what's her name. As for the friend. If you have doubts now, then you may be best to not push the issue. Let some time pass and see for yourself if it is really over. He is not the only one you have to talk to. There are a lot of great people here that really want ot help.
  3. twilight

    twilight Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the advice. I don't know if I am the type of person that would enjoy volunteering at those places but I will consider it. As for this person that I am interested in, I guess there is no hope for any kind of relationship since he has just discovered that I have no social life. Now he will probably think that I am a freak and ignore me. I don't even know what to say to him right now. I know that what he said was true but I was not at all expecting for him to all of a sudden mention that I have no social life.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 17, 2007
  4. DynamiteKid

    DynamiteKid Well-Known Member

    if he cant accept u for who u are, fukk him! thats all i say.
    serious like.
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