I am not sure

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by butterflies32, Jun 1, 2008.

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  1. butterflies32

    butterflies32 Well-Known Member

    I am confused as if I suffer from an ED as I do not really fit into any of the ED bands. I mean I know something is not quite right and that I do have one possibly. When I spoke to the samaritans they seemed quite concerned and told me to speak to my gp.

    Ok so I little bits the maximum of one meal a day not even that. I hate the thought of food in side me as I have to be thinner so everytime I eat I take laxatives that makes me feel better. I am aware that I am in my ideal bmi range...apparently, but everytime I look in the mirror I see this huge fat ugly person looking back. People say I have a gorgeous figure me be curvy, a size 8 on top and 10 on bottom (english sizes) but I do not see it. I want to but I don't. All I see is why people do not agree with what I do if I ever talk about food this is my secret and know one knows what I am doing and if they do not the true extent of it all. I look healthy and well so that makes things an easy cover up. I live with my parents for half the year to which I manage to skip breakfast and lunch and eat half of my evening meal (which is followed by laxatives.) When I am at uni I snack but this would be something like a packet of crips that would last me six hours to get through. and then maybe eat something else. I seem to eat no more than 700 calories a day and depending on what and how much I eat depends oin the number of laxatives I take. God help me if I go over 700 calories. Oh yeah and my weight seems to fluctuate.

    Sorry a small explanation but I was wondering if someone could shed some light on this in terms of ED's and what one.

    someone help?
     
  2. famous.last.words

    famous.last.words Forum Buddy

    hey butterfly,

    you seem to cross around the distinct diagnosic criterias for bulimia and anorexia, but due to your excessive calorie reduction rather than "binge eating" you are probably anorexic.

    I have also heard the term "bulmerexic" banned around for people who hit both diagnostics, but again as you are not binge eating this doesnt really apply. Many anorexics also exibit purging behaviour so id say you still fit.

    When i was originally diagnosed i was considered as being a bulimic in an anorexic cycle or some rubbish, and my behaviour was very similar to yours.

    But, im well not a doctor, this is just my own experience. To be anorexic there are also many other criteria they expect you to "meet", such a losing a high percentage of body weight within three months, ect.

    Maybe you could go and see your doctor who could be much more helpful than me :hug:
     
  3. butterflies32

    butterflies32 Well-Known Member

    Hey

    Thanks. I am ment to be seeing my doctor on Wednesday but I dont want to be feeling like I am wasting her time and making a big deal out of nothing. That is what my mum reckons I do but she doesn't know what I do. Heard of the term just never thought about it applying to me I guess I never even thought about it. There was a time when I dropped a dress size in three months but my therapist at the time did not batter an eyelid. My psychiatrist I have now told me I had one and then the next session told me I didnt. SO I am just really confused. I DO not want the help and yet I no I have to stop.

    Thanks

    xxx
     
  4. savetoniqht

    savetoniqht Well-Known Member

    Just because your disorder does not specficially fit into the category of anorexia or bulimia etc. does not make it any less of an eating disorder. People are diagnosed with EDNOS (literally "Eating Disorders Not Otherwise Specified" all the time.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eating_disorder_not_otherwise_specified
    Wikipedia... not the most reliable, but probably the most straightforward.

    You're not alone in this. Just because it's not anorexia or bulimia doesn't mean it's not just as important or dangerous than either of those.
     
  5. savetoniqht

    savetoniqht Well-Known Member


    Bulimic with anorexic tendencies, most likely.
    You can't very well be both anorexic and bulimic at once, but you can be one with tendencies of the other. At least that's the way I've heard it explained.
     
  6. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    Just a thought to run by anyone struggling with eating disorders. Healthy body weight is very important to your health in general, and if trying to make yourself better leads to unhealthy eating habits, perhaps you can divert your attention to control a less vital part of your body? I try to work with my hair and skin a lot. I may spend a lot of time on it, but it's better than trying to control my weight and I generally like the results. Why not stick with regular eating habits and experimenting with hairstyles and clothes and whatnot instead?
     
  7. butterflies32

    butterflies32 Well-Known Member

    Heya,

    I am leaning more towards EDNOS simply because it doesn't sound so scary. I guess it also sounds nicer and better than saying that I suffer from anorexia or bulimia, which I know is a possibility. I am a normal healthy weight even my doctor told me that I looked healthy until I told her what I was doing and she has sent me to a psychiatrist and was going to send me to an ED clinic but decided that by the time I get in their I wil have to go back into uni. She took bloods for my salt balance and I am really scared about the results and the effect they will have on me. At least I am getting some kind of help. I sm just confused to what it is I really want. I know if I carry on I am getting closer to death and part of me does not want that. But I feel like I cannot stop what I am doing without picking up another addiction. This one seems to suit me.

    Sam
    x
     
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