I find myself sitting here at my desk at college at 11:26 pm on a Saturday night. I would love to be happy, to be out with friends, to be at party or watching a movie. Instead, I find myself sitting here thinking about the past three years and how horrible they have been. From a terribly abusive boyfriend I left, to going in and out of court trying to get him behind bars for the things he did, to the terrible roommate I had, and the horrible environment I am in. I have struggled and fought in vain each and every day to get through things, to get through the sexual, physical and emotional abuse I endured, to convince myself there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. To get through college, and go to work on top of it. I went to a therapist for several months who concluded that I was "cured" and didn't have to see her anymore after about ten sessions. I'm lost. I was once a straight A student. Now I'm failing some of classes, and can't even bring myself to do my work or go to class. I don't understand how its come to this point. Tonite, I ponder my reasons for wanting to end it and how to end it. I am sick of having each day be a battle.