I want to go away. I want to kill myself I have since I can remember . When I tell My husband this he says that I am selfish And a terrible person for even saying that. Maybe I am. I realized something today. I Thought my kids would be the answer.I Thought they would keep these thoughts Away. I expected them to save me But even they are not enough. Of course I love them but my existence still feels Like a burden and waste. I guess I am Selfish. Selfish for expecting my love For other souls to keep me anchored to This world. It is not there job to do that.