I viewed some of these threads on this forum and replied to one but not to any more due to the fact I am in the same boat. I feel if I say anything it would be harmful to them or may look as such so I don't say anything. I am sick and tired of me having to give and please every one and no one ever giving back to me or trying to please me. I do something nice for some one and they say they are grateful but the min i do something wrong i get a talking to and how I keep doing that thing. i'm tired of being broke, poor, on the edge of losing my home, back pain and other damn issues. I'm sick of not being able to commit suicide due to the fact it hurts and nothing is fast enough AND the fact I don't know where i will go after. people say get help but what is help? will they give me a job so i can fix the rut i am in? will they give me money to help? will they fix my back? NO they wont they can't help they just talk. i want some one to do something extremely great for me but that will never come ONLY I will do something great for some one else with nothing in return. Yes it is true no good deed goes unpunished I am proof of that. ending it all may not be an option but not ending it all is not an option either. I am stuck with no light at the end of the tunnel. Oh I thought there was light but it was only a flashlight with a body of some one who gave up finding the light long ago.