People celebrate birthdays coz they are glad that you have been blessed with another year. In my case, people will be hapoier if I am gone, coz I know I am a rock tied around their neck. I am unemployed, and all my so called "friends" disappeared too, since I had no money. I have no support group, I have been estranged from my family since I had an extremely abusive mother. I stuck with the first guy that came along hoping to escape that horrible home situation I had, only to realize that this guy had a tyrannical mother as well. So I left him. He never took it well, and has been punishing me ever since. We have a son and ever since I lost the job, he has been treating me like scum. I am 2 months behind the rent, and the landlord has warned of eviction. I tried reaching out to family, but they just sighed you're too old yo be asking help from us. Sometimes, I just need someone to listen. Its very painful to keep everything bottled up inside. But when I open up, I feel like im being a burden. So when I'm outside, I wish I get into an accident. I wish to die, and I guess everyone will be relieved. Thanks for reading. My birthday is a few weeks away, and I dont have the will to live.