I am so sick of live counseling chats

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by sadhart, Feb 12, 2014.

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  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I tried to use one just now, and the experience was not good. The person I spoke to doesn't understand what the word "crisis" means. Instead, she just kept asking or suggesting things that had nothing to do with what was wrong. This isn't the first time that has happened with that particular live chat. The only reason why I used it again because on a couple of rare occasions, I had a mostly positive experience. I know I sound like a victim and right now i don't give a shit. I am tired of living and I am tired of everything.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    you are so right there will be times you get a great counselor one that gets what you are talking about and then other times you will get perhaps an inexperience one Keep trying though ok because it is worth it when you get the good ones
     
  3. emily83

    emily83 Well-Known Member

    this is the exact same reason i stopped using samaratans.

    as for live counceling chats, well, i've only done 1 online (as part of an english charity) and the lady on their was pretty poor. even though she said she was highest quality to all her members, i don't think she really was..

    it's not put me off though. i prefer online comunications, always have, and probably always will
     
  4. justsomegirl

    justsomegirl Well-Known Member

    Hey sadhart, I'm sorry you had such a negative experience. I used to try to use the online chats also but ran into the same kinds of problems. Maybe it's a hit or miss thing, depending on who's counseling at the time. In any case, there is a chat function here for group chatting (and PMing I guess). Also one site I have been checking out lately is 7 Cups of Tea - it's less of an immediate crisis chat and more like counselors if you need to vent and just have someone listen. I'll include the link below if you want to check it out.

    Anyway hang in there, keep your chin up.
     
  5. Jackie's Strength

    Jackie's Strength Staff Alumni

    First of all, I can relate to your frustration - as they say, "been there, done that!" I agree with the "hit and miss" idea. Also, I think it's important to remember that although the crisis interveners should work with you to gain an accurate understanding of your situation and allow you to feel heard, they will not (because they can not) offer advice. They will be able to listen to you, help you come up with a plan to keep yourself safe, and provide you with relevant resources if you're interested... that is what they are trained to do. Keep in mind the difference between crisis intervention and counselling, too... these services are mostly staffed by volunteers trained in the former. I get the sense that what you want may be insight and guidance... for this (unfortunately...) you must seek formal outside counselling. Stay strong and don't give up!
     
  6. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    No, I wasn't looking for that. I realize after years of calling or chatting with crisislines or chats that they can't give advice. What this lady did was ask stupid questions that had nothing to do with what I talked about. And like I said that happened before. So I guess I'm done with them for now on.
     
  7. Jackie's Strength

    Jackie's Strength Staff Alumni

    Thanks for clarifying that. The questions asked should make some sort of understandable sense, I agree... sometimes the interveners try to steer you into a different (usually more positive) part of the conversation, but it shouldn't all feel disjointed and "pulled out of thin air," so to speak. It can definitely depend on the experience level of the volunteer... the vast majority of the time, they are there because they genuinely want to help... that said, they are not always very effective at doing so. I've tried before in situations like that to just focus on the catharsis of getting out what I need to and to remind myself that the responders are very likely trying their best... perhaps that's something that could be helpful to you as well. That said, I have definitely felt my fair share of frustration and taken breaks in the past, so I get where you're coming from. In the end, it's what works for you, right? Take good care.
     
  8. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Yeah that makes sense. I try to remind myself that most of the people who do this do so because they genuinely want to help people deal with their pain. I think the world needs a mental health system, but it needs a huge overhaul.
     
  9. mark b

    mark b Well-Known Member

    glad you appreciate the different approach or response from counsellors. they are all different people in any case. some will have their own way of doing things that may not always suit.
     
  10. Jackie's Strength

    Jackie's Strength Staff Alumni

    It definitely does. Hope you are taking good care of yourself!
     
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