I dont know how much more I can take of this godamned life....everyday is just misery and some new problem...today I am supposed to start a piddly ass job but I have to postpone it a week because my mom had to go to the emergency room and I had to wait for her to call for a ride home..EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE SUCKS...its cold and MISERABLE outside...I am lonely...and I just want to blow my head off!....NO DOCTORS!!!!!! ALL THEY WANT TO DO IS PERSECUTE ME!!! I HATE THIS WORLD!!!!!!!!! HOW MUCH DOES A PERSON HAVE TO TAKE BEFORE THEY CAN KILL THEMSELVES....I just want to be in my grave next to my grandmother....NO ONE CAN HELPME AND I CANT HELP MYSELF!!! I HATE THIS ROTTEN CESSPOOL OF A WORLD!!!