I am suicidal... but it takes courage to...

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make a change. I can choose to wallow in self pity or I can choose to stand up and force myself out of this pit I am in.

Is this a possible reality? Has anyone beaten suicidal ideation here? Or am I destined to remain suicidal the rest of my life?

My parents want me to snap out of it and forget the past. Just turn everything off and straighten up. Many of you know my story. I am walking the ragged edge of life and lately I am blinded by my own tears and am unsure of my thinking.

I pray... yes I pray. I think God wants me to live because I can help people here as well as let people help me. We need each other.

But for now... another day is done... I survived... and hunger for a reason to live... and the only one reason has kept me alive... I fear God.

Yes you can choose to make a change. Suicidal ideation can be beaten.. I cannot tell you that it always goes away permanently. There are always times of joy and times of sadness. You must dig deep to find the strength to help you along your journey, but it sounds as if you are well on your way. As you know, this is not something you just "snap out of". Survival takes hard work when you feel suicidal. Healing takes hard work. You may be standing at the edge of the abyss, but you can turn and walk the other way. You do not have to fall. Take the option off the table and choose life. I have faith in you to succeed. :hug:


I think about my own death everyday, even on those rare occasions that I'm actually happy. Sometimes its hard to keep from crying. All I can do is bury myself in my work and keep my mind distracted.
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