I am...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by voices_inmy_head, Mar 23, 2008.

  1. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    I am a bitch,
    I am a undiagnosed manic depressive
    I am a rocker at heart
    I have serious trust issues with men so I scare them all off except those which are no good for me
    I wish nearly every day that I was dead
    I am too scared to kill myself incase it gets better
    I have issues with food either not eating or over eating
    I drive too fast on empty roads hoping ill lose control and crash
    I am becoming an alcaholic if I'm not already one
    I wish I was dead right now
    I hate being around people
    I hate being all alone
    I felt happier when I was going to the gym
    I cut myself a while ago and have to struggle not to cut again
    I can't ask for help
    I am what I've made myself to be.
  2. mfrieler

    mfrieler Active Member

    Now make a list of all the positive things you are...

    Compare them and tell me which are more important?

    It's a start..
  3. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    I am a good friend to my best
    I am a good driver
    I am ...

    sigh its too hard to think of anything good :(
  4. mfrieler

    mfrieler Active Member

    No worries. Definitely know how that feels. :)

    Save that list you started...build on it.

    The first thing you listed is far more outpowering then anything on your negative list. You being a good friend puts you a step higher then half this world.

    There is this saying I've been following for a while, from one of my favorite bands:

    "If you close your eyes tight enough,
    then none of the dark can get it.
    If you close your eyes tight enough,
    then none of the light will get it."

    Just keep pushing at it. If I'm making it right now I'm hoping you can too. :D
  5. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    Im glad your making it
  6. mfrieler

    mfrieler Active Member

    And I'm glad your making it right now too. :)
  7. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    fufffff, thats so not true, want to cut, want to drink, want to jump off my roof.

    God dham him! Its been three months and he txts me and screws with my fucking head!

    Ok maybe small panic attack going on here.
  8. mfrieler

    mfrieler Active Member

    Tell him how you feel. If you don't want to hear his bullshit, tell him that. Helps a lot cutting someone off that doesn't deserve to have you or even speak to you.
  9. voices_inmy_head

    voices_inmy_head Well-Known Member

    I've gone down the route I usually go down, he is annoying me so I am winding him up. He is just so thick! I could wave something in front of his face and he wouldn't realise.

    I suffer from anger.