I drove my car into a shed I had built, and had my iPod and everything, but I didn't go through with it. I just don't understand why I have been cursed with feeling unhappy every minute of my life since at least my teens, and why I have been unable to change it! All I want is a hug, someone to love and to love me. I am chronically mentally ill, and every minute is a horrible struggle. No treatment or medication has helped. Again, all I want is to be loved. Is that so much to ask?