I've been pretending for so long that everything's alright... In its very own odd way it is, always. It has to be right? I have people who need me. I guess after a while of saying it.... It just is. My facade is so tight around my face, I don't know how else to be. I'm fine. I always am. I have to be. So, I close my eyes. Hopefully, sleep so deep that when I wake up it's so possible that I didn't exist that I can pretend I don't. Why not? I pretend it's always alright, and I'm always fine. It all works out. If I reveal my weakness, my world destroyed, everyone else's around me crumbles to mock my ruin. I know this. I am perhaps the strongest weakling. In my existence anyway. Who can I talk to? My ruin is quite ugly. My weakness is quite pathetic. My burden feels so heavy that it alone is putting me in the ground. I have to try this. I have to try something. I can't pretend much longer, and I can't take my life. As I said, I'm needed. I lost my very close friend and uncle to suicide. I won't allow my grief to fall on the hearts of my loved ones. I feel hopeless. I guess we all do... I don't know what else to do. I found myself learning <Mod Edit:Methods> Then I learned about fembutal. Then I learned of this forum. Here I am... And I'm fine.