they keep changing my medication, i'm having reactions to this one, and then they said they want to try another antipsychotic, and then if i keep having a reaction another mood stabilizer, this shit is driving me nuts, my moods are all over the place, i flipped out on the pharmacist, i flipped out on my family, now i want to die, i don't think this is working, but maybe its just that i've been at the computer all day trying to decode my fucking biology homework. im not meant for this life, fuck this bipolar bullshit, i cant deal with this life. i want to die, but i cant kill myself, i have kids to take care of. at least im currently coherent enough to understand that. i feel like i should just do it and get it over with, but i can't. i feel like a prisoner in hell.