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I've gotten to the point where i want it to end. I can't keep up the facade anymore. i just can't. I promised him, I wouldn't attempt again and i want to so badly just to end it. Get away from this hell called life.
I know going on sometimes feels impossible. But, you can go on. Yes, life certainly can be hellish at times. But, there are also good times. You can go on.
You mentioned in another post that you didn't care about hurting your parents...but you had one friend....that said he would be in therapy for decades if you died by suicide.
For the sake of your friend, do not consider suicide as an option. Your friend will be in therapy for decades. That's no joke. Is that the kind of impact you want to have on his life? Is that the memories you want him to be tortured with for the rest of his life?
You can go on. It won't be easy, but, you can do it. You can make it.
8 years ago, like you, I didn't want to "do it anymore"....and at that time I couldn't imagine life getting any better. I was in hell. My life was hellish.
But, it did get better. I have not suffered from suicidal thoughts for 7 years.
Hang in there. Get help. Find Support. And learn how to cope with life...