My life is just full of ups and downs. Ups that last only a few minutes before taken out by a down. A feeling or thought that just doubts the up. I wasn't always a pessimist... I used to be a very optimistic person, but then this cloud came full of pain and fear. A cloud that no matter how bright the sun is, it can't get through. These thoughts that cause to doubt myself and others. The fear that wakes in the middle of the night to be weary of tomorrow. I can't keep doing this. I can't keep living this life. This life where nobody understands what it's like and tells you that you just need to work through it. As if saying that you feel this way because you are weak. So why must I keep going when no one wants to be around me because I am such a burden? Simple. I shouldn't. I shouldn't continue to be this burden that my family carries.