You are free to want to live in a world where men aren't expected to 'harden up'.
I never said you must harden up, but you will eventually... passively. You are hardening up currently this moment. Shedding those tears at the sight of those pictures. Changing into a different you. A new perspective, maybe a feeling of a little jealousy but also envy. You want to be something different, your current state of displeasure with yourself will eventually force you into a new.
Don't worry though, I felt the same way first going into college. Afraid, insecure and wanting to be accepted in the 'in' crowd. Things will sink in, and you'll realize it's all the same. The power is in your hands to change the future.