I Can't Go Into College

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by NeverHappy, Sep 21, 2008.

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  1. NeverHappy

    NeverHappy Well-Known Member

    I just can't. I can't sit around with all of those fools joking, laughing and talking shit left and right. I can't focus on my work when I feel like this.

    What can I do?
  2. purplefizz

    purplefizz Senior Member

    Are you in college now? Or in high school?

    I often feel the same way. I have a difficult time functioning, and I probably won't even go tomorrow.
  3. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    That was actually the worst symptom of depression for me. I've got a 98% GPA and I would like to keep it that way... but it's so damn hard to go to class some days.
  4. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    Do it anyway. You'll regret it if you don't. Especially if you have the resources and opportunity now that you may not have later. If you're young, you may not realize it but this stuff gets harder as you get older. You don't have as much energy when you get older. Your mind also might not be as sharp. It's best to get things done when you have an open opportunity. Even if it is a PITA.
  5. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    You should still carry on with it. I'm sat here after being sent to a "special" school for people with Autism. They had no academic provisions so I left with no qualifications or education. My sister has just gone off to Uni with good GCSE and A level results to study nursing. I have no chances as the door to "free" education has closed on me and I am unable to pay fees to go back to college.

    I would give my right arm to get back into education, I want to go back into computing because thats the area I do well in. I'd prolly go back and do it to degree level if I could, but I can't.

    If your at college and not school sometimes the rules are more relaxed and you may be able to take an ipod or personal radio to listen to during study time and when your given projects to work on alone. You can often take your work to the library or study area, where people have got to be quiet or they get asked to leave.

    Just don't throw this chance away over a few rowdy kids, they'e the ones who will leave with no chances, don't give up on yours. Once you get to a certain age you lose rights to education and it's so sad, you'll hate yourself for it later down the line.
  6. Rooftop

    Rooftop Member

    I know exactly how you feel. I've got to start uni again tomorrow, first day of fourth year. It's getting harder and harder to do the work, especially when I'm in a bad way, it just so hard to concentrate on anything else.
    Do try your best. You'll regret wasting your education and you will have the knowledge that you have had the bravery to go in and do it.
  7. NeverHappy

    NeverHappy Well-Known Member

    Lol, it has nothing to do with a few rowdy kids. It's an annoyance, but I've been seriously fucked up and hardened to the point of being hateful by people so a bunch of punks aren't going to stop me from getting an education. The problem is in myself.

    Besides of that, other things discourage me. My family are so poor that we can't even afford paper - paper! I've done without it for the first three weeks of college. I don't have anything to eat or drink during the day because we can't afford it. I'm so skinny now due to starving throughout the college day that I now have a 26 inch waist as a 6'1 inch tall male.

    Also I have terrible insomnia, and have to go to college having had no food AND no sleep.
  8. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    But you can afford an internet connection....
  9. NeverHappy

    NeverHappy Well-Known Member

    Implying that I'm bullshitting?

    This internet connection financially cripples my family, and that's no joke. Their are four adults in my household who could work but don't - my mother supports them with benefits.
  10. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    No I'm not, I'm saying food is more important than an internet connection, if you can't afford to eat, then surly that comes first?
  11. NeverHappy

    NeverHappy Well-Known Member

    I'd go fucking insane without this internet connection. My family don't talk to me (I even have my own food seperate from my other family members - just bread and crisps) and I've never had a friend in my life. My loneliness is quite literally soul destroying.
  12. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    If you can't afford food at college then try taking your own. You can make a packed lunch these days for under £2, all you need is some cheap bread, cheap cooked meat of you eat meat, or salad etc & a peice of fruit. Some people still manage to eat on £1 a day.

    I'm not trying to antagonise you more, I'm trying to help you see your perspectives right.

    Anyway I'm off to bed, sorry if I was no help.
  13. NeverHappy

    NeverHappy Well-Known Member

    I should have mentioned that I have no appetite anyway. Eating makes me feel sick.

    Anyway, I won't be posting here anymore. Nobody here can help a fucked up creature like me.

    I appreciate the effort.
  14. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Sorry to hear that your family is so poor that you often go hungry neveryhappy. Why doesn't anyone in your family want to work? It's really hard to go through college with no food in your system. Also, being 6'1" and having a 26 inch waiste seems pretty underweight to me. You need to eat before you become anorexic.
  15. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    There must be something you can do to earn some money. I mean, I don't know if I could handle college and working but if I was starving, I think I'd have to try.
  16. TheWr0ngChild

    TheWr0ngChild Well-Known Member

    I just told him he can make a packed lunch for under a pound these days, like you can buy bread for 20p, cooked meat for about 40p packet of crisps 10p and a bottle of tap water, done.

    Or if it's that bad give up on college and get yourself a job doing anything, it might have to be something really shit like cleaning or serving tables in a cafe or whatever, but it'd feed you. How come mum gets benefits and there's no money for food? Is she budgeting it right and saying no to things she can't afford? Any decent parent would put feeding people before ANYTHING else.
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