I can't handle this.

I'm having a really really hard time and am thinking about Overdosing. I just want to die and i can't stop crying, but i have to cry silently because my roommate has been in and out of the room and i dont want to attract attention or talk about it with her, no one i live with knows i have mental health issues. i feel guilty calling my therapist when i talk to her so frequently and its the night and the weekend and because at the day program i am in they keep reinforcing that reaching out to friends or family for help is selfish, bad, and wrong i now can't bring myself to call my parents or a friend because it makes me feel anxious and guilty and like an even worse person. i can't handle this. got in a fight with a girl on another forum who i was trying to help, and no one is willing to stand up for me, everyone just looks the other way. clearly something is wrong with me that i don't deserve support. i can't keep living when i feel like this. I'm about to throw my whole life away over something so stupid. I can't handle this. i deserve to die. i'm a pathetic fuck up who deserves to die.

 

Hi Megan,

Just letting you know that we're here listening, and I'm sorry to hear that your threads on another forum were ignored. On a different note, it's a pleasure to meet you in chat. :hug: Cheers... Mr. A

 

Hey Megan,
You have come to the right spot for help... First off forget what that other girl d=said and wash your hands of that forum..We are all about giving support and advice.. You sound like an intelligent person.. THink about the fight, Is it worth hanging on to?? No, it was a spirit of the moment situation.. Just let go of it..Now about your parents you can tell them or not everybody is different in that case,.,.I would consider talking to a school counselar..I hope some of this helps..Take Care!!

 

I think this is it. Now that moderators on the other forum are calling me passive agressive when I WAS JUST TRYING TO FUCKING HELP and yes i got pissed because i was being lashed out at and no one, fucking no one is on my side there, now that moderators are calling me passive agressive even after i'm saying i am thinking about killing myself, and they are more concerned with what a fucking horrible passive agressive person i am than the fact i'm about to end my life, i see no reason to keep living. thanks for the two of you who replied.