I can't hang on anymore

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by cateka, Mar 20, 2009.

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  1. cateka

    cateka New Member

    I'm so tired. There's nothing left, I just want to die.
    Bulimic for 7 years.
    Nothing EVER gets better, and I'm so sick of hearing people say "I know things look bleak, but its not forever". 7 years doesn't really seem like a temporary thing.
    I can't talk to a councellor - I can't tell her how I stuff myself twice a day, bring it up, go to the gym for two hours, stuff myself again, bring it up again and then go to bed in a mixture of falling asleep and fainting.
    HOW can you talk to someone face to face about that?
    I also hate prozac. It makes me feel like I'm just going through the motions, like a thoughtless little ghost. I'd rather be dead than going through the motions.
    Its damaging my speech - I actually find it difficult to speak, mentally. The words don't come out right. I'm so physically exhausted and wound up inside that I can't physically form sentances. People are going to start to think I'm 'special'.
    I don't have the energy to do anything anymore...
    Why me?
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry that you are struggling so much and I really hear how hopeless you feel.

    Why is it you feel you can't talk to your counsellor about this?

    Do you know what caused your ED?

    I would suggest going back to the doctor who prescribed the Prozac and explaining how you feel. It might be its not the right med for you, or not the right dose, or you're still struggling with side effects.

    I too have struggled for a long time (17 years) with a variety of problems and it is very draining but you do never know what's around the corner and what might change or what might happen. I know that's so easy to say, but it is true. The future is unknown.

    What kind of professional help do you have?
  3. Erxi_Kusanagi

    Erxi_Kusanagi Member

    I have similar things happen to me ( i have anorexia though). I fall asleep at night from a mix of exhaustion and fainting, and frequently have problems talking because I either can't for sentences or will start sentences and start slurring words together or just stop talking mid sentence because i can't physically make my tongue and mouth move or brain produce the words. People give me the strangest looks when that happens, and after it has happened a couple times around the same people they start asking questions, but I can normally just bull shit an answer like I'm exhausted because I got 2 hours of sleep (which is true about 95% of the time)
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