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I can't help it

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I want to die
I want to die
I want to die
I'm horrible
Everyone would hate me if they knew the real me
No-one knows me
It's so hard to keep up the charade
I hate me
I really hate me
I want to die

I need help
I'm so scared
No-one knows me
I am so alone
But I hate me
haven't been to work since end of August... can't focus... Doc not happy with my lack of progress in getting well

i'm not good
today is not good
this week has been hard
i don't know how to fix me

i have the perfect life... so why am i like this? why can't i snap out of it?
they'd all be better without me, without me whining on and dragging them down everything would be perfect

i'm so horrible, i hate myself for what i've done, i've ruined everthing
i hate myself, oh god i hate myself so much for what i've done

my plan is complete
my 'to do' list is almost complete
I will have to set a date soon - i can't bargain with myself anymore

therapist and meds aren't working, i'm so trired, so scared
i'm sorry
but i have no one to talk to
i can't share with anyone in the physical world - i have 24-7 help numbers - but can't ring from home - oh god i hate myself so much
i want to die
i can't do this anymore


Staff Alumni
What do you think of your doc? Do you think he/she is a good fit for you, and what kind of things is he/she trying for you?
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