I am one day away from my university exams, I haven't studied, I am panicking, I can't study, I just can't... I was stupid to think that I would ever be able to do this. I failed it last time around, what the HELL made me think I could do it this time??? It's not like I've gotten any fucking better... but yet this time I am so close, I'm almost there, I attended all the classes, but now I am crashing, ITS NOT FUCKING FAIR... I'm so close... I think I need the hospital, and I know I have said this countless times, but I'm so scared, so scared of what I will lose, I can't bring myself to call a cab, I can't even bring myself to leave my fucking room in residence. No one knows I am like this, I don't want anyone to know I am like this... I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE... I am so lost... I am so close to finishing the term, but I am so scared, I really want to kill myself, and I really think I need a hospital, but the other half of my brain really wants to complete the term, and I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE I wish I could just leave this place, leave this earth and never have to deal with any shit again... I hate living..