i can't stop cutting. most of the time i even wonder if i want to. i know all of the clinical reasons 'why' i do it - its a sense of control, its an outward expression of the pain i feel inside...i get it...i just can't seem to stop. don't get me wrong, i'll decide to 'move on' and 'get better' every couple of months but i just can't seem to make it work, no matter what i try. it is mostly the control that i desire, the reason i struggle with my ED, the reason why i cant seem to stop cutting. part of me just doesn't want to... how fucked up is that? i don't know. i just can't stop.i don't expect anyone to answer, i just needed to write something to keep my hands and mind busy for a little while.