i've been in the hospital three times so far this year. and things just keep getting worse and worse. my therapist is talking about going back to the hospital, but what's the point? nothing changes. we have sold everything that's sellable, down to our bedroom set (we sleep on our mattress on the floor now), still trying to sell some little things, but no luck. we have now lost everything we owned that's worth something to the pawnshop, because we can't make the payments. there were some things in there that meant a lot to me. and it's a LOT of stuff that's gone. we still don't have car insurance. our trash doesn't get picked up anymore because we're behind on the bill. i'm going to lose my car any day now because we can't make the payments. i have lost all three of my dogs. i have sold my baby, my piano. if we don't come up with a mortgage payment by the end of the month we're going to lose the house. we have so many unpaid bills, it's unreal. there's only one hospital left around here that we don't owe money to. every day, all day, people are calling wanting money. i don't even answer the phone anymore. or open the mail. and today i wanted to make a cake with the rhubarb in my yard, and i went outside to discover that the hailstorm last night completely destroyed my rhubarb. i know that's silly, but it's just one thing after another. i can not take it anymore!