Yeah. I feel pretty walled in right now to be honest. It's kinda uncomfortable.. Why do I want a hit... I dont know. I suppose it's that feeling or release of all these materialistic things, and the freedom to venture deeper into thought. But what good is that. I want something concrete to have with me. Im just a thought and feeling now it seems, without any substance. Amazing the bullshit that has to spew out in order for me to begin to feel without a drug. Like little back doors at my own expense. Ug. I could do with a hit.