There is a new song by Eminem, 'The Monster' - some if you may have heard it, it features Rihanna on the chorus, and it is burning up the charts. This song chronicles his struggle with mental illness. 'I'm friends with the monster under my bed' - I take that lyric to mean he has accepted that he is mentally ill. I do want to live, but not like this. Is mental illness a permanent black mark on my record??? Can I beat it??? Will it recede into my past so I forget??? Can I live and not always look over my shoulder to see "who knows?" Will I find peace??? If the answer is yes, I have a future, then I will go for it. If the answer is no, I am permanently branded with "the mark of the beast", then I am done, and will just off myself. This as it is now is a miserable experience.