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I Dont Care Anymore

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Mogimochi, Sep 9, 2013.

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  1. Mogimochi

    Mogimochi New Member

    I just don't. Its been days, weeks even. I don't know I've never had a good sense of time. I don't have a reason to get up in the morning, so, I don't. But I can't sleep at night. I'll go for days awake only to pass out for a good day or two. I can't cry. I'm sad. All the time. And I just can't? And ot hurts so much.

    I have one good thing in my life and it just terrifies me. Nothing lasts forever. Nothing. And what am I supposed to do when that good thing dies?

    Nothing, I want to end it all before that happens. And you know what? I could. So so easily. And I might just do that. Nobody would miss me.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi Mogimochi I am sorry you are not feeling so well and you are so sad. You say you have one good thing hun hold onto that ok Have you talked to a professional have you reached out and got some help for your sadness if not do it ok phone your doctor and get some supports for you
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I hope you'll reach out here, seek support and let us try to help you through this.
  4. Mogimochi

    Mogimochi New Member


    Ive.been to CAMHS before, but it was useless. They talked as.If I wasn't even in the room with them, and basically. Ssid there was nothing wrong with me and called me cynical over and over again.

    I don't see the point in trying now. All they do is say I'm just stupid.
  5. Psych77

    Psych77 Well-Known Member

    OK, you have not found the right mental health providers for you. You have to keep looking.

    You say you have one good thing in your life, and that nothing is forever. Well, you are right about that. But your depression is making you look at that one thing as the last thing you have. The illness is controlling the way you think. If you were healthy, you would look at that as the first thing, something that you would build on - that would be your anchor while you used the good feelings it gave you to seek out other things you like. But your illness is preventing you from thinking that way - the way you normally would.

    I think you should get treatment. A good therapist will probably try to help you to change the way you think, so it will take some effort on your part, but it will pay off. You may also need medications - I don't know.

    What is the one thing you have going for you? I hope you don't mind my asking, but I would like to know.
  6. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Mogimochi, I am so sorry to hear that things are this hard for you. Shame on CAHMS for treating you like that. Sometimes the system can be so hartless. But yet there are very good caring people also. I know you sure came across some who were uncaring to do what they did. I hope soon you will find some people who are helpful, respectful of your needs and caring. You deserve that.

    I am glad you are here. you said there is one good thing in your life. I think I know what that might be. Because I read another post you made here. I bet that one other thing in your life would not do well at all if you took your own life. Yes?

    If you ever need to talk on the phone to someone there is the samaritans in the UK. http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us I got that link from the suicide forum under "links". I have read some people say that they did get help from these folks. So maybe you can call them if you need to. BUT please keep posting here. Because I think this is a very good community. People here do care.
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