I don't even know anymore....(Trigger)

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Anthony, Jan 12, 2011.

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  1. Anthony

    Anthony Active Member

    I'm not really sure how to start this, or to explain it, but I can't keep it all to myself anymore, so I'll do my best.

    I started cutting again about a month ago, I can't tell you why I do it. I don't bleed easy, so it just leaves some scars. It doesn't hurt enough to take my mind off any emotional pain. It's just become more of a hobby because of a lack of anything better to do. I can't even say I enjoy it really, but I've pretty much lost all interest I have in anything, so that might not be a fair assessment.

    I don't even hide it anymore either, I lack the motivation, and care to be afraid of other people's reactions. The only real question I've gotten was just one person asking where the marks came from, and I told them I used a razor blade, they just said cool, and walked off.

    I'm beginning to think maybe if I'd at least be afraid of someone's reaction, I wouldn't do it.

    I don't know if it's going to lead to other things or not, I'm figuring it will since it is pretty impulsive on my part.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I think you need to find something that brings you enjoyment okay. You like music you like art sports get into somthing okay so you are not so bored Harming yourself is not a hobby and it is addictive. Please talk to someone okay school councilor your doctor someone and get some help. Cutting one self is a cry for help.. hugs
  3. Rego_Jumper

    Rego_Jumper New Member

    I stopped cutting 7 months ago and I am SOO happy that I did. I loved doing it as much as I hated it. I don't bleed easily either, so I would slash my wrists, ankles, and legs with the hook of nail clippers. I trusted myself until I sat down in the bathroom home alone with a massive knife debating on whether or not to do it, how deep, and where. My family was all depressed and I was extremely depressed as well. I remember calling my friend who knew about my cutting saying how scared I was and I was crying...she told me she was coming to get me...I freaked and convinced her not to. That was the end of the knives. I continued with little things. I still have visible scars. Just keep in mind that some day when you have children, you will have to explain to them what you went through. Maybe they will start...do you want that? Obviously not...this is what helped me to stop. I hope you seek help and stop destroying your body one slice at a time. *hugs*
  4. Yikes.. make my stomach flip when i read your post about you cutting yourself.. Don't do it..
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