sigh... so my girlfriend went to the football game and shit while i was at work.. yeah so on my way home she calls me and tells me about the night and shit like how she kissed some guy and other shit. yeah so im obviously upset about that and i love her so much so that kinda hurts. so we talk for a while and she just hung up on me and wont talk to me. yeah so i lied in the middle of the street crying and smoking like a chain smoker. oh i was home btw. but yeah i just wanna kill my self like im not even fucking joking. i am trying to keep away from the medicne cabnet... its getting hard to not go ever there and take whatever i can find. but i dont wanna go to hell or whatever so i dont even know? fuck!!!!!!!!