i dont even know

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by whynotme?, Dec 27, 2008.

  1. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    i miss him so much, we were only together for 3 weeks but he made me feel human...

    he treated me right, he looked after me and now i have absolutely nothing! thats how it feels... and it shouldnt

    he wont even talk to me.

    so now, im sat, on my own thinking bout how i never get anything right... i dont even know why he is gone... but he is... i hate this so fucking much

    im so alone...

    i would rather just curl up in a ball and "sleep" than put up with this feeling... i hate this so godam much...

    *cries*

    xxx
     
  2. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    He's not even talking to you? Why did you two break up? If he wont talk to you, he doesn't sound like the greatstest guy in the world. I'm sure there is someone out there who is better for you. I understand the wanting to curl up in a ball and not face all this. I'm sorry you feel so badly. :( :hug:
     
  3. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    he wont talk to me cos its too hard... we are so so right for each other and we cant be together and so we're both taking it really hard but i just... i seriously am sick... in every relationship i am ever in - even non-romantic ones - i either get used, abused, abandoned or all three (i sound like a walking cleche...again, ridiculous) an im fucking sick of it... i cant take it anymore i just cant... i really really dont wanna play anymore!!!

    i dont know what to do with myself or what i did wrong... i cant keep doing this... im not sleeping, im close to becoming an alcy, my friends and family wont leave me alone cos they are worried about me and that just hacks me off even more... ARGH!!!! FUCK OFF!!!

    xxx
     
  4. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    Why can't you two be together?
     
  5. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    He is moving away in september... he said he thought it would only get harder, the longer we stayed together... i agreed to begin with but... i didnt know it would already be this hard... i have known him for nearly 6 years... i'm so screwed up

    blah

    xxx
     
  6. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    I'm in a long distance relationship.. yea it can be hard, but if both parties are willing to work at it, it can work out fine.
     
  7. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    he wont do it, says it would be asking too much of me and putting me through too much and he cares about me too much to do that.. plus, tbh, i think he finds me hard to deal with sometimes cos im so screwed up, if he lived too far away, he would spend all of his time worrying about me and he wouldnt cope with it...

    plus, we live in uk and he is thinking of moving to canada... we would literally never ever see each other :(

    it just feels so so typical and unfair... blergh

    he's amazing...

    xxx
     
  8. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    :hug: I'm sorry it's like that. sounds really bad and both of you could get hurt...

    But you'll find someone else who's right for you. :hug: :hug:
     
  9. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    it's taken me 23 years and a lot of abuse to find him... can i really do that again???

    blah

    xxx

    thank you for ur kind words of support though...

    xxx
     
  10. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    Sometimes it takes a lot to find the right person. It's never easy. But over time you'll become wiser, and maybe the right person will just come to you. Never know. Love is always tricky.. I'm around if you want to talk or anything. :hug: <3333333
     
  11. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    thankyou...

    i hope ur right... right now, i just want to be in his arms... he would make me feel safe... i dont feel safe...

    xxx
     
  12. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    love knows no bounds whynotme? if you truely love him, him moving should not stop you, do everything you can fight to be with him, if this is your one person than take him and love him be happy, you deserve it :smile: :hug:
     
  13. whynotme?

    whynotme? Well-Known Member

    he wont let me... he doesnt want me....

    he doesnt think its worth fighting for! i would be with him... regardless of distance...

    i dont know what to do to get him back...

    xxx