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I don't get autistics

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Things, Apr 22, 2010.

  1. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    I don't understand autistic people, yet I am one.

    I joined a site called Wrong Planet, a forum for people with autism. I've lurked a long time ago, just re-joined it again. Despite being diagnosed with autism, I can't seem to relate to the other users there.

    It's just frustrating, it's like I don't understand anyone.

    I also hate seeing people complain about their autism, saying things like they wish they could cure it or that everything will be fine and dandy if they didn't have it. Maybe I need to be more sympathetic, maybe I'm being self-centered, but I feel like I'm being personally insulted when people say these things. Even my mom said she wished she could cure me (under the impression that I'd 'like' to be cured).

    I get irritated when I hear people say things like this, like they're trying to deny/insult a part of me. I don't see autism as a bad, nor a good thing. It's just...a thing. It's a part of who I am.

    Maybe I'm the one in the wrong here. Maybe I'm just not seeing it from their point of view. Still, it pisses me off. I want to tell them "get over it, work on your problems", something to that extent. But then, I'd just be a giant hypocrite, wouldn't I? :/

    I also hate how some people use "NT" (neurotypical), at least on that forum. It feels...dividing for lack of a better word, like an us VS them mentality. I'm probably the only one who's getting that impression though.

    Just felt the need to rant. I have a feeling I'm going to regret it in a short while. :/
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I don't think you should regret it you are just stating things how you see them how you feel. I think with autism there are different levels of the effects of it.
    You maybe a higher function level so can see things in a clearer way thats all. take care
  3. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    I understand what you're saying. I feel it with people on MH forums too or anyone who kinda segregates or determines that lets say all people with 'schiziophrenia' or 'DID' has a certain prognosis and is gonna die or be hospitalised for the rest of their life cos that what the DSMV says! or....I wish I didn't have this/that/the other be 'normal' etc.

    I have similar features to autism, but it's more to do with severe avoidment attachment and trauma. I had an ex who, when I look back did appear like she had AS, and was diagnosed by a psychologist as having Asperger's or 'selective mutism' but she changed in the 7 years I was with her. She said I opened up a very perceptive part of her brain cos she felt socially atrophied for so long through what I was bringing to the relationship, showing that people grow, and from what I read, different levels of autism can change over time.

    Maybe some people just have the need to belong, label themselves and feel like they are a part of something, and some people are a lot more independent thinking and know themselves far better than any diagnosis out there?

    PS I wanted to ask, do you think AS is an overly diagnosed condition, and that some people who just plain nerdy and shy need some kinda validation by a psychiatrist?
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 26, 2010
  4. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Violet: Eh, maybe. I don't know my own severity though. Thanks for responding.

    Ggg: To be honest, I think it's overly self-diagnosed. It seems like over half the internet have some form of autism. :/
  5. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    :D thanks for saying this. I think so many things are over diagnosed- bipolar for one, I have so so much trouble with that diagnosis seeing as I know why I go manic.
  6. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    Bi polar is definitely over diagnosed. It might have to with people misdiagnosing it when it's actually depression. Either that, or because having a mental illness is cool now (at least in certain crowds. It could be just that I've had more exposure to particular people).
  7. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    I relate to everything you say. Glad to know there's a kindred spirit in here when it comes to certain things :cool:
  8. empty101

    empty101 Well-Known Member

    I've never got to know anyone with autism personally, but I've read/talked about it quite a few times.

    I never viewed people with it as bad. You just got to keep in mind that psychologists are only concerned with who is "normal" and a lot of the diagnosis are ultimately driven by "fitting in". If they see you are different, they will make up a word to explain what you are and a diagnosis etc. etc. They might even bring up things like chemical "imbalances" but the way I see it is in nature there is no correct, normal or properly balanced. These are just human terms made up to ostracize people and their behavior. Sure, sometimes it's necessary for a functional society but a lot of people take it way too far.

    You're absolutely in the right. This idea of inferior/superior being implied and justified by what they claim is "science/social science" is just collective stupidity. Of course, this isn't something you can really explain to most people and expect them to fully understand.

    If I were in your situation, I'd throw out others ideas that I was autistic. Don't label yourself, be yourself.

    Just my opinion
  9. Krem

    Krem Well-Known Member

    Of course you don't understand auties- That's sort of the point. Autism is not "being sligtly off". It's being, for lack of another word, completely bonkers. Not in a harmful, comical, or cute kind of away. That you can't relate to them tells us that either you, or, more likely, them, aren't actually autistic. Self-diagnosis is silly, and even if we like to do it, we shouldn't state it as truth.

    The fact that people wish for you to be 'cured' is because they see autism as a hindrance in you being a constructive member of society, which they want you to be. And, seeing as how autistic people are seen to be, it's only to be expected.
  10. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    ggg4567: Agreed.

    empty101: Kind of like how there's a disorder for every personality flaw imaginable?

    Krem: I thought I'd relate to them because we have the same diagnosis. Kind of like how I relate to other people here because we have depression or other diseases. I guess it just doesn't work the same way. :/
    I agree with the self-diagnosis thing. I think part of why it's so popular, is that people (including me) want a label to hang on to. Something that makes them part of a group. Maybe even something that excuses their behavior ("it's not my fault I can't make friends, I'm autistic!").