i dont get it

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by onlysadsongs, Apr 8, 2012.

  1. onlysadsongs

    onlysadsongs New Member

    i dont get what everyone is doing.
    when people speak it all seems to be a joke, pointless.
    i dont understand humanity
    it seems parasitic,
    i dont want to be any part of it.
    i dont think i have any zest for anything.
    alcohol numbs everything and makes the days tolerable,
    but my body can only tolerate so much before i start feeling stupid (day after day of destroying brain cells)
    so i stop drinking and snap back to reality, bringing me to my current state.
    i know what i want, i dont feel as though it is attainable anymore, i dont think it even exists
    i just wanna crawl under a rock and hide.
    like i'm considering going in the woods and digging a hole and just hiding in it.
    i feel foolish and ungrateful for everything i have and to still not be satisified.
    but when it comes down to it, everything everyone does seem silly and utterly pointless.
    a part of me consistently feels like im on a bad mushroom trip
    theres a place that feels safe, a place i feel like i can never get to, i know what it is, but i feel so far away from it. i just want to go there, but its so far away and i dont have a map
    i feel like a naked man in the middle of a crowd of people with pitchforks.
    i dont know where to go, or what to do.

    ...maybe i should go to africa or something?
  2. grei

    grei Well-Known Member

    I think I can relate to a lot of that. I'm considering and researching different volunteer overseas programs, not necessarily the peace corps, but something sort of along those lines. Then I'll be as far away from American ignorance that I can manage on my own, be using my time and resources to help people and make positive changes, at the same time not having to deal with the corporate plastic cookie-cutter life "They" want me to have (endless bills, and taxes, and liabilities and licenses and contracts, and numbers numbers numbers.. the things that never fail to push me right over the edge).

    Maybe you should look into that kind of thing? There are jobs you can get contracted with the government (military) and get sent overseas, but just doing a normal job like a secretary or janitor or something. You could also volunteer to teach underprivileged children English, or there are probably programs where you could work along side social workers, journalists/media....
  3. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Wow, you described just how I feel most of the time. Yeah, humanity does suck, but there are still good things in the world. You just need to find something out there that can make you truly happy, and don't worry about anyone but yourself.