I'm done with pretending, posting unregistered and trying not to bother people. You can ignore this if you want. I won't hold it against you. But I just don't have anything else I can do. Yesterday I started seeing multicoloured spots. Sarahg was an absolute angel when I logged on here in a panic, and she phoned an optician who said he thought it was stress. Last night I went to bed early (1am! Early! Jeez.) and I was so paranoid, so scared of the dark, I kept looking around wildly to make sure there was no one in the room, hugged the bear tighter - yes, a few months back I started sleeping with teddy bears. I am so pathetic - and was just like whispering, chanting under my breath, trying not to panic and burst into tears. Today, I got up and just could not do anything. I got dressed and got onto the couch and just couldn't move. My arms and legs were so heavy. I get like that sometimes when I'm really tired but this was the worst it's ever been. My mum was out, and I just went to sleep - despite having 8 hours sleep, by the way - and I've basically just had a horrible day. I've had a few dizzy spells and my legs have given out a few times, sending me floorwards lol. Luckily my mum hasn't been there when it's happened! I don't know what to do. The least little thing is making me snap, I feel so tired all the time, even when I've just woken up, I'm fantasising about hurting myself, I'm obsessing over scraping the skin off my face and the switches, the fucking switches. My RL friend sarah is telling me I really need to see a doctor because it's clearly physical with the dizziness and spots but I don't think it is! Unless it is and it's just because I haven't been eating enough (now who would believe that? Jeez. I eat far too much) or going out enough (though I was out on Wednesday, we went to see a film and there was some walking involved). So I just don't know. I can't go and see a doctor because my mum's kidneys are getting worse and she doesn't need to be worrying about me. But I don't know what to do Please help, someone...Please.