I don't want to get too deep into alot of my background, my age, what I've been through with people I don't know. Yes. I've been considering suicide for a few weeks now. Even found myself researching it. My main reason for joining is the fact that I need the bravery to talk to someone I know and trust about it; my mother. To put it simply, I fear telling her because of her reaction. When I was younger I was on and off with self harm. Mainly just cutting. Each time I found out her reaction was quite negative. Don't get me wrong, my mum is amazing. She's one of the most amazing people I know, and would never want to go out of her way to hurt me. But she just doesn't know how to react when it's something this severe. First time she found scars on my leg, there was alot of yelling and shouting. The second time the cutting was brought up, she completely shut down and when I told her I was doing a few months ago; hoping that talking would make me want to stop, I got the biggest guilt trip of my life. I don't know how to find it in me to sit her down and tell her how much of a pathetic human being I am and tell her that when I try to see myself even three years from now I see absolutely nothing. Nothing makes me happy anymore and all I can think about is ending it. I admittedly feel kind of stupid posting this. And a little afraid someone I know will find this and start problems with the people I know. But it's all I have left, and I'm hoping it'll help somehow.