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i dont know if am glad or worry .

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by acecoffee, May 28, 2012.

  1. acecoffee

    acecoffee Active Member

    i was diagnosed with severe depression since i was 17 . since then i had load of different diagnosis such as Socail anxiety disorder , OCD , PTSD , psychosis .sometime when i am able to manage and dont fit the criteria and it will be written down as ''symptom of.......'

    for example i couldnt even answer the phone or speak to any stranger at all when i was diagnosis with Social phobia but it got better after a long therapy and after i was force to deal with it as i lived alone with my sister who refused to answer the phone for me so although i still have diffculty ,i m still able to manage day to day life .

    i moved to stafford for my university. After 3 meeting ,my new psycharist cross out all of my existing diagnosis one by one and replace it with borderline personality disorder(BPD) . .he believed my depression and psychosis was cause by BPD and constantly change my medication . he told me i wasnt responding to the treatment and i m likely to be like this for the rest of my life (constant struggle and heavy dosing medication to keep me 'sane' )and then suggest my team to discharge me ,i was in (Early intervention team and home treatment team in stafford as 'they cant help me anyway'.he didnt tell me why he diagnosed me with BPD.

    after hearing what he said i was getting worse and had suicide attampted. it was confirm by a professional that my life had no hope of recovery at all.

    after the school year finished i moved back to my home town for summer and recently had another suicide attampted . i was refer to crisis home treatment team and i request further information on BPD , i also looked up online about more information on mental illness. i do not quite understand about my diagnosis of BPD and question regarding it as i felt pretty much the same in mood as when i first was diagnosis . i also been completely honest and tell them i m suicidal and the fact that i plan everything other then the suicide method and it need to be 100 % sure it will work .(i wrote letter to loves one , wrote down how i want my funeral to go etc)

    they then seems to believe a second psych assessment is need and seems to have a bit of quiry about that , they believed i also need a Eating disorder unit assessment .and tell me .my GP seems to think it is severe depression as well .

    i dont know glad that i might actually get an answer as i was extremely confused about my diagnosis at the moment but at the same time i felt like an idiot . i m worry about my new diagnosis and i would hate it if they really diagnose me with bulimia and ptsd even though i think i might had it . i feel lke people are going to judge me even more if i have a lot of different mental illness diagnosis .
  2. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    It seems medical services are incredable lacking, I went to the doctor recently for arthrites and he tried to a cancer treatment center fot a hogh white blood cell count cuased by my medication. I had to tell him this for him to figure it out then he acted like it was his idea. Well u have us to talk to and spewing your moments here may help. This is totally meant to be helpful by the way so please read this in that light. It can be frustrating bur you sgould do everything to understand your condition and how your body works so u can help them help you. Buy a book called greys anatomy. I dont know what psych book would hekp indorm u but maybe s
  3. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    But someone else might know