I am a 23 year old soldier and I don't know if I can handle the situation I am in any more. I cannot say where I am but the stress of this place is extremely high. Because I have been trained in a high-demand technical field, the Army has begun to require an ever increasing amount of time for the mission. I now only sleep about 4 hours each day, an amount I would have thought was impossible to survive on (and maybe it isn't possible to live like this, since I feel like it is killing me.) I am now entering the second month of this routine, and I almost thought I could make it, until I sustained a physical injury that has left me in constant pain and severely limited my basic mobility. But the demands of this mission are relentless, and even with my injury I am expected to perform on the same level that I had been at. Thankfully my buddies have been helping me out as much as they can, picking up the slack when I no longer can do something. But even this is not enough. I always told myself I was to proud to go out this way, that I was determined to fulfill any obligation I was given. But recently another soldier in my unit killed himself, and even though I have seen that his actions have had a negative impact on us all, I can't get what he did out of my head, and I envy him so much. I need to escape somehow, but I do not want to abandon my buddies. I feel hopeless, but I'm scared to get help. The field I work in is very sensitive, and people with psych "profiles" are quickly removed, which ruins their prospects of good careers later on in the civilian world. So it's come down to all or nothing here, I have to hold on to ensure that things can one day get better, but if I am unable to then I feel I should just give up entirely, like I should give up on my career and my life and my mission. I just feel so spent and I want to sleep forever.