I don't know if I trust myself, I wish I could trade places!!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by downunder, Sep 5, 2008.

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  1. downunder

    downunder Well-Known Member

    Ever since my daughter died last year, I have wanted to join her and made a few attempts along the way. Have been seeing a workplace counsellor who has since left and now seeing no one from work.

    My sister in law is dying of cancer and has only weeks to live, I so wish I could trade places with her. She is very upset about dying. She is having blood transfusions at the moment to keep her alive.

    NOw she lives 1000km away from us and we both took time off work to travel to visit her.

    I have told my husband I don't mind if he stays while I travel back home, because I would like him to spend as much time with his sister as he can.

    But on the other hand I don't know if I trust myself to stay at home without doing anything silly. But I don't tell him this, as I am worried about him being worried about me.

    I also feel like saying to her to hello to my daughter for me, but I don't think that is the right thing to say at the moment, the doctors say it is only going to be weeks.
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter and soon the loss of your sister in law too. Cancer is such an awful disease. I don't know if you would really want to trade places with her though. Death by cancer is very painful and leaves you feeling very weak, due to the powerful drugs that you have to take. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
  3. daniel2

    daniel2 Banned Member

    Hi Downunder,

    I don't know you but can only think that if I were your child I would not want you to leave your husband, my father, to join me. You still have a place on this earth and people who love you need you here.

  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I am sorry about your loss and the future loss of your sister. You need to stay strong for your husband. He also feels those losses. Maybe get him to post a thread with the forum to help get his emotions out so they don't eat away from the inside. Maybe the two of you can see a therapist together. It might give you a little sollace. Take Care!!!:chopper:!!!
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