I don't know if this counts

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by wallflower, Feb 12, 2008.

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  1. wallflower

    wallflower Well-Known Member

    I was feeling kind of upset. And I've been pretty suicidal over the winter. I swallowed almost a whole bottle of <mod edit-gentlelady-methods>
    I was thinking, in my next life after I reincarnate I will have my wishes come true. Ill have a beautiful body, boyfriend, friends, a pretty face.
    I left my music on and then I lay down on the couch and kept swallowing and swallowing pills. Then I felt tired and fell fast asleep.
    Then my dad came home eventually and saw me asleep with the bottles by my bed and took me to the hospital. They gave me a blood test and it turns out I was fine. Thank god. But It's amazing how I don't even feel like anything happened. I just blinked and woke up in my bed in different clothes. I remember things in a blur. I had made myself three sandwiches
    I remember staring down at my arm having the blood drawn. I remember dad there. But it was like a dream. It completely feels like i dreamt it, I would have said it was a really weird dream unless I had woke up with the band on my wrist and a bandage on my arm.

    That was the freaky part. I saw the wrist band and was like....oooo
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 13, 2008
  2. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    I'm sorry you had to go through that. How are you feeling now? Did the hospital set you up with any supports? For a while after an attempt you can be in a haze, not just the physical trauma to your body, but the spiritual and emotional upset of attempting. Your body might "shut down" a bit to heal... that might be why it seems so unreal.

    I'm glad you didn't succeed. Come here and post if you want to try again, ok?

  3. wallflower

    wallflower Well-Known Member

    I made this in large because I thought no one probably could read it.
    I am feeling fine. I don't think I overdosed. I just took too many pills. But I slept for the whole day and until 1 in the morning.
    Thanks for being concerned.
    I shouldn't have done it but i was feeling kind of bad.
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 13, 2008
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