A lot of things are happening at the same time and I'm not dealing allright with it. School is driving me crazy with so many things to do at the same time, I feel lonely even with so many friends (that ARE friends, not just colleagues), my creativity somehow left me and I'm not creating anything good, suicidal thoughts come to my mind from time to time, my mood is changing in a crazy way, and like I didn't had enough problems (even if they're small), I still have to deal with my grandfather diseases. Now not just the cancer, but the Alzheimer too. In a high level. I'm feeling weak. I need to clear my mind, but I just CAN'T. This is driving me crazy.