Hi,
Since I was a little girl I've had so many bad experiences in life. I lost people closest to me who I loved so dearly, I'm suffering from cancer and everything and everyone seems to be against me. About a year ago I started to date this guy who seemed to be true and caring. An honest person, but after a few months everything seemed go for the worse.
We met eachother over the internet about 5 years ago and we finally got together. I lived in a different country than him at the time and I assumed that most of our problems seemed to be due to the long distance thing. I moved in with him and his family not too long ago trying to get over the trust issue's I had with him (he went home with another woman....)
Now, he went out for a nice dinner with his colleagues and this girl rang me off of his phone, asking me who I were and telling me to fuck off from HER boyfriend.
I always saw my boyfriend as my saving angel, that one person I could and should trust. I've never trusted anyone as much as I trusted him.
I've always cut myself since I were 9 years old (I am now 20) but now it's gone deeper and more.
It's not an accident, I hope I'll cut deep enough to bleed to dead. Eventhough there's something in my mind telling me to not do this the feelings to give up in total are way stronger.
I don't know what to do anymore, I'm sat here just crying and crying and I've tried everything on the list that could keep my mind off of selfharming or even worse (drawing, writing etc etc.)
Anyone, please help? :distress: :hurt: :concern: :Cry:
Since I was a little girl I've had so many bad experiences in life. I lost people closest to me who I loved so dearly, I'm suffering from cancer and everything and everyone seems to be against me. About a year ago I started to date this guy who seemed to be true and caring. An honest person, but after a few months everything seemed go for the worse.
We met eachother over the internet about 5 years ago and we finally got together. I lived in a different country than him at the time and I assumed that most of our problems seemed to be due to the long distance thing. I moved in with him and his family not too long ago trying to get over the trust issue's I had with him (he went home with another woman....)
Now, he went out for a nice dinner with his colleagues and this girl rang me off of his phone, asking me who I were and telling me to fuck off from HER boyfriend.
I always saw my boyfriend as my saving angel, that one person I could and should trust. I've never trusted anyone as much as I trusted him.
I've always cut myself since I were 9 years old (I am now 20) but now it's gone deeper and more.
It's not an accident, I hope I'll cut deep enough to bleed to dead. Eventhough there's something in my mind telling me to not do this the feelings to give up in total are way stronger.
I don't know what to do anymore, I'm sat here just crying and crying and I've tried everything on the list that could keep my mind off of selfharming or even worse (drawing, writing etc etc.)
Anyone, please help? :distress: :hurt: :concern: :Cry: