Just as I thought I was getting my life back on track I'm slapped in the face with a whole different set of barriers. In September I started seeking help for self harm and now I'm content in saying almost a month has passed since the last cut. I had old baggage from a technical previous attempt with a fleeting ideation. But in general I was starting to take a hold of things. Things have turned sour though, the slight ideation has just expanded out of my control. Suicide is constantly on my mind now. I'm having just awful visions of plans and I can't confide in my best friend(she has her own issues to deal with the last thing she needs are mine) The counsellor isn't really helpful towards this part shes just telling me to be at one with the part and to take flower essences. I keep breaking down in tears. I'm almost certain I'm depressed but I can't get tests done in my local GP so now I'm on a two month waiting list (which is understandable). I've also been self medicating and getting rather stupid with it. This is all piling ontop of a lack of sleep from insomnia and anxiety. I don't think I can do this anymore. I just want to curl into the corner and scream.