There is an extensive history of depression in my family. My grandfather did it. I survived an attempt when I was around 17, attempted again when I was 23. Now these feelings come back again. The black thoughts, wishing random things would take ur life and knowing that this pain is too unbeatable to deal with much longer. I made alot of mistakes in my life & felt that I was actually moving forward but now I'm back at the point where everything is just too cold and dark for me to go foreward without hurting myself.