For the last 4 years I have been depressed and often thought about suicide but never really thought it was a viable option. However, recently I was getting to a real low point and then I did something that I will never forgive myself for. I can't talk to anyone about it and I came here to find a non judgemental, helpful stranger who will talk to me confidently and help me through this. Now It seems like suicide is my only possible option. I don't know what to do and I don't know if I will ever feel good again. I either have to move on or beat myself up until I do eventually give up. I don't know why I'm posting this but I don't know what else to do.