I don't know what to do.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Silvi, Sep 22, 2007.

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  1. Silvi

    Silvi Member

    I don't know what to do anymore. I've never felt like killing myself before, let alone actually trying to do it, i've always been happy with everything. Ever since my Grandfather died in October i've been so damn depressed. I've always been so tough and have been able to handle anything. I guess it just really hit me hard. I felt like just killing myself for the longest time, but i never thought i would actually do it. I eventually tried to for the first time in May by crashing my car..but i didn't succeed. It was really scary and i kind of talked to my grief counselor at school about it, but it didn't really help much. I tried again on July 4th by binge drinking and i was so close to killing myself but once again shit didn't pull through for me. I haven't tried since July 4th..but only because i love my little brothers..but that only lasted for a while and now what do i do when that won't even help? I don't have anything else to live for. Seeing that other people on this website are going through similar things kind of makes me feel a little less anxious. I've never told any family or friends about this, but no one knows who i am on here so it makes it a little easier to talk about it. People pat me on the back and say i know it's hard but time will heal it but i think that's a damn lie, they don't know what i'm going through, they don't know it's hard.
    Thanks for listening :help:
     
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