I don't know.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Nearly, Oct 7, 2013.

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  1. Nearly

    Nearly New Member

    I don't know how much longer I can go.

    This will probably turn into a rant, but oh well.

    I don't know what to do. I have no reason to be here, all I do is go to school and come home. I have no friends, I can't make friends, I can't even talk to people properly.

    Recently started seeing a therapist, I told of my suicidal thoughts, but downplayed it quite a bit to where it isn't taken into consideration. I feel like I lied to the therapist and to my mom, both of them being in the room. I let my mom down, she started crying right there. I just wish no one cared about me even in the slightest my parents do so I would have no reason to give it a second thought. I want to go. Drift off forever.

    Every day I wake, and I cry. Every day. No exceptions. I cry to sleep and I cry when I wake, everything is saddening. Get an A on that paper? Oh well, you could have gotten an A+ you stupid fuck. Going to end up homeless.

    Perhaps homeless isn't a bad thing. A year of separation would make people forget about me and then I could go without causing anyone any harm. And there wouldn't be anyone personally to pay for my choice.

    I don't know what to do. I don't think I can go on with the exponential growth of the sadness that seems to take over.
     
  2. Selex

    Selex New Member

    I've never read a post that describes so accurately what I'm going through.If you're still here,please don't go yet....I mean...I don't know anyone else who feels this way....the way I feel...everyone else seems to have a diff. prob. and I kinda would want to ....talk to you...you know...to share and let it all out if you'll allow me...please reply.

    Selex.
     
  3. Nearly

    Nearly New Member

    Sure. I'm here, here for now anyway.
     
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