I don't know.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Lastnight, Mar 1, 2012.

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  1. Lastnight

    Lastnight Active Member

    To start off my rant, I'd like to inform everyone of a few facts. I currently share a home with my mother, father, younger brother three dogs, and one cat.

    My father is currently the only one with a regular income (He works as a custodian at a hospital, and he receives a monthly disability fund) , although my younger brother receives tips from his work, occasionally.

    We just received our tax refund less than five days ago, with a value of 4700$ .

    My mother is missing a tooth, and desires a dental bridge, confirming that required funds for the operation would amount to 4000$ - post insurance coverage (Why so expensive?! :sad: ) .

    My mother proposed we use our tax refund to supply the cost. What?!?! That's over 80% of our tax refund (Having spent some of the money, we can't even cover the full cost with the tax refund now) !!

    I'm sorry that your missing tooth bothers you, but it's not causing you any pain! It may look rather silly, but have to bear with it for you - please re-think your priorities!

    For some reason, even my father agrees (Aside from recent times, they are usually not on good terms) . I tried telling my mother that we need to save some of the money for when we cannot afford food otherwise. She then trivializes our past hardships by saying : "We shouldn't have to spend our tax refund on food. I don't want to make the same mistake we made last year."

    Would you rather deal with the anxiety and stress of not having money when needed? This home only houses one breadwinner, sometimes, that just isn't enough to support four humans and three animals.

    Not only would we have to go back living off low provisions, I 'd feel kind of left out if she performed the surgery. Just recently, my brother received a root canal operation (Total cost ; 500$ - post insurance) , to remedy a problem that was actually causing him PAIN, my mother plans to undergo a dental operation for aesthetics?

    I have 12 cavities, and level 2 gingivitis, what does that leave me?

    When my mother and father informed of the plan yesterday, I threw a verbal fit of sorts, voicing my disapproval. My father then went on to say to all I do is complain, without any intent of improving the way things are now. He also said that I've wasted a lot of money in the past, for unnecessary personal desires (Most, if not all, of what he said about me was true) .

    I'm going to try ask my mom to save some money for the operation 1,000 - 1,500$ or so) , and not perform it now.

    I would to live without the fear of having no money for awhile, if only temporary. If she blindly spends the money like that, I'm not sure if I can prevent myself from doing something stupid..

    Honestly, I, along with with my family would be much better if I just croaked....
    I can die in my sleep, or someone else can take my life, but I promised myself I wouldn't take my own...

    Am I just stubborn? A complete fool? A selfish pig, perhaps?

    Anyways..... thank you for reading. I appreciate it.
  2. FrainBart

    FrainBart Staff Alumni

    No, you are not stubborn, nor selfish nor a fool. You reasoning behind it all is extremly valid, and the fact they are not even listening to reasoning is more selfishness on their part. the missing tooth is cosmetic, and not causing discomfort, so it can wait. there is more important things in life than having a full set of teeth.

    Being able to provide food / roof is far more important than a cosmetic patch up.

    You have every right to complain, and it is not your duty to change things, they should be listening to your suggestions and work on them to see if they work, so you have all the right to be angry with them. So what if you have wasted money in the past (if it was your money, you had every right to) and that is in the past. Gone. Done. cannot be changed.

    Your mother saying that she doesnt want it to be like last time... well it will be if she selfishly spends this $4000 on a single tooth just to make it look right.

    I can completely understand you being a bit hacked off with this :hug:
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 1, 2012
  3. Descendant

    Descendant Account Closed

    I think your mother is insane for wanting to spend that money instead of putting it away as an emergency fund in case something serious happens. I don't think she's going to win any Miss USA pageants because she got a new tooth, so how exactly can she justify that? It's completely outrageous and irresponsible in my opinion and in this case two wrongs to don't make a right. Even if you've wasted money yourself before (so has everyone) that's a sorry excuse for her to use and very immature.

    A lot of people make the mistake of thinking of tax refunds like "free money" from the government when in fact it is not. It's money that you had to sweat for that the government borrowed from you and is now giving back what was left over, and thus should be treated like any other paycheck; to pay for food and other important bills not trying to make yourself look pretty. You have every right to be irritated with her, she's putting the entire family in financial jeopardy for a minor facial touch up.

    I don't think your family would be better off without you, in fact you sound like the main voice of reason in your household.
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 1, 2012
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