i dont like pain i like the blood and scars

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by baby.bop, Jan 9, 2008.

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  1. baby.bop

    baby.bop Member

    ok so everyone seems to say that SI is about the pain or the release or watever

    but i hate the pain of the knife but what i get off on is seeing the life pouring out of me, i dont want to feel the pain, i dont want to feel anything

    and when i see the scars it seems like they were meant to be on my body, i deserve to be hurt,.

    am i the only one that feels this way? surely not
  2. Twisted Sweet Lies

    Twisted Sweet Lies Well-Known Member

    I like seeing it more as well. I don’t really even notice the pain anymore. It’s like it’s there but it’s not. It’s not really a sharp pain I notice but more of a dull one.
  3. austinhp78

    austinhp78 Well-Known Member

    im fairly new to the whole thing but already, each time i do it, i slowly become less susceptible to the pain.
  4. Rose24

    Rose24 Chat & Forum Buddy

    you are not alone on this one, i very much like my scars and the blood, though I like the pain too. For me, the scars prove that i have control over my body: like little trophies, and the blood gives me a sense of achievement, the more blood, the better.

    I’m aware that there is a physiological addiction to cutting from the endorphins, as far as I’m are this is linked to pain side of cutting. I suppose the blood and the scars would be linked to a psychological side of addiction.
  5. Kinetic

    Kinetic Well-Known Member

    I feel exactly the same
    The pain isn't really what attracts me, its more the feeling of seeing blood or feeling my scars heal

    But it's the pain that makes me feel calmer and relaxed =S
  6. i know what you mean. I can't stand the pain, it doesn't help me much, but the bleeding relax's me because i can just watch it, then afterwards when there's a scar, i like that bit. I just feel like i need more scars, because i think they define me or something. Anyway, i know what you mean.
  7. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    I could never really feel the pain anyway. Sometimes I just did it to look at...mmmm blood, just thinking of it makes me want it so bad...
  8. expressive_child

    expressive_child Well-Known Member

    I can't believe it, I just started cutting a few days ago and though I don't do it till I bleed, but I like seeing those marks and I guess I understand now why is it so tempting cause it helps in a way. At least, it makes me 'feel'. But I think I will be smiling to see my blood flow.
  9. feel the rain

    feel the rain Active Member

    i feel the same. i dont like the pain very much but i almost cherish the bruises and scars
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