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i don't matter

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ava321, Jun 9, 2014.

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  1. ava321

    ava321 Active Member

    I don't have any friends. I hardly see my parents and I live in their house. I'm just kind of "there" and that's it. Nobody has ever helped me or supported anything in my life. I've had to take care of everything on my own. It doesn't really matter if I die. I'm unmarried and no kids. Nobody depends on me. There might be a handful of people who fake some sympathy because it's polite.. but I'll just fade away in a matter of days. Everybody will move on and since I don't interact with anybody now, life won't be different. I think my time here is just over. I don't matter at all. I'm so insignificant. What's the point of living life if it hurts just to wake up? I'm ready for this all to be over. So over.
  2. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Hi ava, I am sorry to hear how life is for you at present, but want to encourage you that things will begin to change for you with some new insights. Especially concerning the point of living. It is very normal to live for x number of years with the expectation that come from the common assumption that life will work out for us and that we will be happy and all things positive, until we find ourselves faced with the opposite. However, it doesn't mean that it's the end when we find a brick wall in front of us, I'd like to encourage you in this truth - that with the right help your future will not be more of the past once you get insights your past hasn't had. Please PM me if you want to
  3. Twocky61

    Twocky61 Banned Member

    'course you matter Ava

    As with urPrecious my pm is open to you too if you feel the need to chat


    Nick xx
  4. JV3

    JV3 Well-Known Member

    I used to feel that way. I lived in my parents house (where my grandmother also lives) and despite them always being around, I was just "there." I kept to myself, and I felt like a burden to them. I had a very small amount of friends, and even with them I wasn't close enough to talk about my problems. I felt like I was just drifting through life with no purpose. I wasn't married and didn't even have the prospect of a girlfriend. It was a lonely time and emotionally crushing time for me.

    That was less than two years ago, but a lot changed since then. I am in a much better place today, and when I go back and read the things I was typing on here two years ago, I honestly can't believe how things really did get better. There certainly is no set formula or time table on when it can happen, but things really do get better over time - for some people it just takes longer. I was in a slump nearly 3 years before it got better, but the important thing was I hung on no matter how bleak things looked and no matter how little hope I truly had in me.

    Just don't hold it all in. You matter. Your thoughts matter.
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