I Have been in a pretty deep hole of despair for about a year and a half now. I attempted suicide last december and was almost successful had i not thrashed and regained consciousness. I haven't worked a steady job since 3/2019 despite countless interviews and applications. I found i will not be able to conceive a child, my husband has seeking the affections of another woman and gave me divorce papers ( 11+ years together) my mothers cancer returned and is more aggressive, i have no friends anymore because the only one that i actually trusted died unexpectedly. i have made a plan b but haven't put it into motion yet. i don't enjoy any activity anymore unless it's sleeping.