i was in the hospital a few weeks ago for being suicidal, and i felt good afterwards, much better. now i'm crashing again, and id on't understand why. nothing bad is going on, there's really no reason. but first i felt some sadness. then it turned into depression, and by now i'm just sick and tired of feeling like this. i don't want to deal with this anymore. i'm tired. i just want to sleep all the time, which is not an option because of the kids. i feel like i can't breathe, like this huge weight is on me. last night i totally lost it and couldn't stop crying. i ddon't know where this is going, but i do feel emotionally completely exhausted.